Caregivers don’t always get long stretches of downtime — but short moments throughout the day can still give your mind and body a meaningful reset. That’s the idea behind a 10-minute coping strategy.
“A coping strategy is anything that helps you release tension, regain perspective and reset,” says palliative care social worker Eileen Pinoos, MSW, LICSW. “It only takes a few minutes. And with practice, your brain starts switching into that calming gear more easily.”
Here are a few to try.
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1. Turn on music — and maybe dance a little
When you’re running on empty, music can be one of the quickest ways to shift your mood.
“This is often the first thing I suggest to caregivers: Make some music playlists,” says Eileen.
She suggests two themes: a calming playlist to help you destress, and an upbeat, energizing playlist that makes you want to move.
“Close the door and dance to it. For real,” she says. “It’s counterintuitive, but movement helps you build energy.”
> Read: Moving through grief: How dance & movement helps kids heal
2. Try 8-7-4 breathing
“Breathing exercises are super important as a way to reset,” says Eileen. “And they’re quick — even five minutes works.”
Her go-to is 8-7-4 breathing:
- Inhale slowly and steadily for eight seconds, focusing on expanding your abdomen (not your chest).
- Hold for seven seconds.
- Exhale for four seconds.
- Repeat for at least a few minutes, or as long as you like.
For even more relief, pair this with progressive muscle relaxation (next).
3. Add progressive muscle relaxation
Start at your toes and move upward, tensing each muscle group for four to five seconds before releasing. Then work in reverse, from your head and neck back down to your feet. The whole scan takes about a minute — repeat it several times.
“You’ll feel different. By the third time it’s shocking how relaxed you are,” Eileen says.
Tip: Try it with peaceful music from your calming playlist.
> Read: Caring for the caregiver: 10 signs of caregiver burnout
4. Move through five slow yoga poses
Choose any five gentle stretches — cat/cow, child’s pose, downward dog — and move through them slowly. Repeat the sequence three times.
“Caregivers live in their heads,” Eileen says. “Yoga helps you get back into your body, which is where the stress really lives.”
The key: Take your time.
“If you race through yoga moves, you will not get the relaxation effects,” says Eileen. “Three slow rounds should take the full 10 minutes.”
5. Sit or walk in nature (or in a sunny window)
Getting outside, even briefly, lowers stress hormones and shifts your perspective. If weather or mobility keeps you indoors, find a sunny spot and sit there for 10 minutes.
The challenge: Do nothing else.
“I have a chair in my home where the sun comes in,” Eileen says. “At least once a day, I make myself sit there, directly in the sun. I resist the urge to get up and do anything else. When I think of something else I could be doing, I just push it out of my head. It becomes a clearing space.”
> Read: B.U.R.N. I.T.: Simple reminders to stop caregiver burnout
6. Practice a small moment of gratitude
Gratitude isn’t about ignoring stress — it’s about widening your focus.
“Caregivers often get stuck in a negative feedback loop,” Eileen says. “Gratitude takes you out of your own head and helps you notice the positive things around you.”
Try writing down three things you appreciate in this exact moment — your warm kitchen, the flowers outside, the neighbor walking their dog. You can also create a simple gratitude wall with sticky notes somewhere you’ll see often, like your fridge. (Avoid your phone, where it stays hidden.)
If gratitude feels hard, try a “thank-you” instead. Write a quick note to someone for anything, big or small, that comes to mind: “Thanks for taking out the garbage!” It has the same effect.
7. Do one small, productive task
This one surprises people. But for many caregivers, accomplishing something small is grounding — and in a small but satisfying way, empowering.
Spend 10 minutes on something contained: wipe a counter, tidy a drawer, fold a little laundry, organize the mail.
“Only 10 minutes,” Eileen warns. “Don’t turn it into a two-hour project.”
> Read: From a dementia caregiver: 10 tips for self-care
8. Say yes when people offer help — then suggest something specific
Caregivers often decline help because they’re uncomfortable admitting what they really need, or simply can’t think of an assignment on the spot. But your friends and loved ones want to help, and with a little preparation, you can make it worth their time.
In a quiet moment, jot down a short list of helpful, concrete tasks.
Examples:
- Pick up prescriptions
- Walk the dog
- Sit with your loved one for 45 minutes so you can get out of the house
The next time someone offers, you’ll be ready.
“Let them know, ‘I need help in these certain ways,’” says Eileen. “A good friend will understand.”
Next steps: Choose two strategies to practice
You don’t need to do everything on this list — pick just two, and practice them a couple of times a week.
What matters most is consistency.
“If you do a coping technique once, it will calm you down in the moment. But if you practice it two or three times a week, it becomes muscle memory,” says Eileen. “Over time, it becomes a built-in way to ground yourself when life feels overwhelming.”